Feb. 18, 2025
Celebrating Success and Creativity in Alex Dumas's Journey
Ever felt out of place growing up, like you were constantly juggling between different worlds? Our guest, Alex Dumas, knows that feeling all too well. As the youngest of four in a Haitian immigrant family in Long Island, New York, Alex's childhood was filled with the challenge of balancing cultural expectations while carving out his own identity. This episode invites you to join Alex as he recounts his journey of discovering the power within himself, emphasizing the importance of staying true to one's values. Through his candid storytelling, Alex highlights how the support of family and community became his anchor, helping him navigate the complexities of identity and belonging.
Get ready to uncover the secrets of building unshakeable confidence even when life throws curveballs your way. With the tenacity of an athlete, Alex shares his insights into the thrill of setting ambitious goals and the crucial role of pacing to prevent burnout. This conversation is a treasure trove of wisdom, where you'll learn how asking the right questions can transform challenges into golden opportunities. As a seasoned keynote speaker, Alex reveals his approach to amplifying voices, celebrating achievements, and finding strength in collaboration, all while staying rooted in one's story and self-worth.
The power of storytelling and creativity takes center stage as Alex delves into his current endeavors, from hosting the podcasts "Love, Serve, Care" and "Elevate and Celebrate" to planning new projects like "Speak Up, Standout." You'll hear about the importance of embracing authenticity and the fun side of connecting through platforms like TikTok. As we discuss the unpredictable nature of emotions in parenting and professional life, you'll find inspiration in Alex's ability to balance personal passions with responsibilities. Join us as we explore the art of sharing genuine stories, celebrating milestones, and extending gratitude to the community that supports and uplifts us.
Brice Harney
Life On Record
Miles of Smiles Entertainment
Richmond Punch
TK Hair Salon
Ogden Ventures LLC
CEO of Ogden Ventures LLC
SnappBandZ
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
Love & Light - Keep Hope Alive
Chapters
00:02 - Personal Journey of Overcoming Challenges
14:48 - Building Confidence Through Life Challenges
23:36 - Navigating Life's Challenges and Triumphs
33:14 - Inspiring Conversations and Future Plans
42:49 - Creative Exchange and Authentic Stories
Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:02.927 --> 00:00:06.134
Hello and welcome to Keep Hope Alive podcast.
00:00:06.134 --> 00:00:08.829
Today we have another special guest with us.
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I'd like to welcome Alex Dumas on the show.
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So welcome, welcome.
00:00:14.688 --> 00:00:15.471
Thank you, Nadine.
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Welcome myself.
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Good to be here.
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Oh good, I'm so glad.
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So you're a professional speaker and a best-selling author and I can't wait to dive into your story.
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It's going to be so fun.
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But, alex, I always have a question.
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My first question of the day is okay, let's put it this way we're best friends.
00:00:38.274 --> 00:00:41.310
We got invited to go to our friend's wedding.
00:00:41.310 --> 00:00:47.368
So we're walking into the ceremony part and to the right we see something we need to sign.
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What is that one thing we need to sign to let our friends know we were actually there.
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Let them know that we were present the guest book.
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Yeah, Very good, Yay.
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So one of the biggest sponsors I have here is Life on Record and what they do instead of having a guest book.
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It is a vintage rotary phone, so your guests walk up to this vintage phone, pick it up.
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They can leave a message Congratulations on your big day.
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We're so happy for you.
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Many years of happiness and joy and love.
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And then you might get a groomsman.
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It's about time you put a ring on her finger.
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Whatever the message may be, it is there for your guests to pick up and leave that message.
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Also, they have a little sign with a QR code that they can scan with their own phone so they can leave a message before or after.
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Now this phone goes good at any event, but I always use the subject as a wedding and stuff.
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Now, what they do with the messages?
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They will burn them either on a 12-inch vinyl record or you can get a keepsake box.
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Now their plans only start at $99.
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You get the phone number.
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I got to make sure you hear number.
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You got to return the phone, but the phone number for one year.
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So this is a great thing to have at your event to listen to everybody congratulating you or wishing you well, Please visit them at wwwlifeonrecordcom.
00:02:21.417 --> 00:02:23.921
All right, so here we go.
00:02:23.921 --> 00:02:29.454
My second question of the day who is Alex DeMoss?
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Wow, Gosh, how much time do we have for that?
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Right Cause we can.
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That could be hours and hours.
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You know, for what you said earlier, I'm a professional speaker, best-selling author, leadership expert, community leader and all these different things, and I share all that kind of upfront like wow, this looks amazing.
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So impressive, alex, you're awesome.
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Like yeah, all that's true.
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And I also want to let the audience know that it wasn't always like this.
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I didn't always believe that that was capable or possible for me.
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You know, I'm somebody who grew up in a pretty much regular life, mundane, in Long Island, new York, youngest of four kids, my parents immigrants from Haiti, and that comes with its own different cultural standards and expectations to live by, and a lot of those I fell short of and I wrote about this in the book.
00:03:26.866 --> 00:03:50.645
So you see behind me a journey of riches, a power of self-discovery, where I, honestly, nadine, was somebody who was always kind of in between things, right, Always kind of on the inside, but outside not quite fitting in, wanted to be accepted, wanted to have people like me, fun, personal guy, but also quiet, shy, you know some people might say like a introverted, extrovert.
00:03:50.645 --> 00:04:07.671
I don't know if that's the the right term for it, but I just know that for myself, feeling out of place, out of sorts, trying to find who I am, trying to find my identity, trying to find my voice in the world, and that maybe led me to test out things this way of like.
00:04:07.671 --> 00:04:29.586
Maybe I can be in this group, or maybe I can be a part of this, this crowd, and fall in here and at at the core, really losing myself, losing who I am, and through years right, it's taken years to get to this point of recognizing, oh, I have a lot more power within than I thought was possible.
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I have a lot more to offer the world.
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I actually have a story that matters, a voice that matters, and I have a supportive, a beautiful family with me my wife, my two kids, cousins, aunts.
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You know the whole deal in the community with me kids, cousins, aunts.
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You know all the whole deal in the community with me.
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And I think now that's what I do my best to share from the stage is that we're we're never really alone.
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But we also have to recognize it's okay.
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It's okay to be alone, but not lonely, right.
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It's okay to be in solitude and be sovereign, but not in the space of compromising your own values, your own beliefs, to fit in or to bend to somebody else's expectations and in that case I think that is what prevented me from what I call winning in life.
00:05:16.151 --> 00:05:17.173
I'm a competitive guy.
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I used to play sports football and boxing and taekwondo so I'm like the competitive drive, like that thing, that inner thing in me, boxing and taekwondo.
00:05:26.528 --> 00:05:35.579
So I've like the competitive drive, like that thing, that inner thing in me, and I've also been on the side of where I've used that to to harm myself, harm others, and I've used that to now benefit other people and empower people and inspire people.
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So that's a quick snapshot of who I am and what I'm here to do.
00:05:40.319 --> 00:05:45.843
Wow, you know, you said you were the quiet one and it took me back to school.
00:05:45.843 --> 00:05:52.827
There was a quiet, quiet boy and now he's a comedian and I was just like you break out of that shell.
00:05:52.827 --> 00:05:58.531
You know, it's kind of like you know, and I say also, the quiet ones are introverted.
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If you are, you seem like a free spirit just by talking to you.
00:06:02.894 --> 00:06:12.168
So, but they are usually very knowledgeable, very smart, they set their goals, they go after it.
00:06:12.168 --> 00:06:13.511
It's win, win, win.
00:06:13.511 --> 00:06:19.750
And, as you talked about competitive, yes, and just staying driven and focused on those.
00:06:19.750 --> 00:06:21.072
That's always great.
00:06:21.072 --> 00:06:27.091
So, but yeah, I mean your journey of you know, moving to New York.
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What was that like for you?
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Because I know I'm a Jersey girl, but I was only there till age six.
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Yeah, and you know, I grew up in New York, right, my family was born.
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I was born in Brooklyn.
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We moved to Long Island when I was probably four or five, right, really young.
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So Long Island, brentwood to be specific, has always been my home, and for the past.
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Now we're recording this 2025.
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So it's going to be going on eight years since me, my wife and my kids we moved to North Carolina, and the way I like to tell this story is that it took us eight years to figure out how to move in eight weeks.
00:07:06.079 --> 00:07:09.024
So Rewind Time back to 2016,.
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We are just going through life, right, we're just kind of making it right.
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Our son just turned one, our daughter is going to be six and there's a lot of craziness happening in our area, specifically where, um, there's there's gang murders, there's assaults, there's a whole lot of chaos around us.
00:07:31.692 --> 00:07:35.887
Uh, and my wife and I, we knew like we wanted to get out.
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We, we knew we we weren't gonna be able to afford what we wanted with the way taxes and things like that were and just all that.
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It felt like everything, like this pressure cooker, everything just going on, just collapsing around us.
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So, fast forward, 2017, over july weekend, we're like you know, let's go scope out north canada, let's go scout the area, because we've been talking about georgia, we've been talking about florida, talking about all these different states.
00:08:03.283 --> 00:08:11.547
But for you watching, for you listening, have you ever been there where you just like kind of run your mouth a little bit but like you don't take any action?
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It is not a judgment, but this is where I'm coming from.
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Like I want to do this, I want to make this happen and no, no actions taken, nothing, nothing goes on.
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So fourth of july weekend we visit the area and I just gotta say this quick thing, because it's funny to me.
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I'm thinking it's like new york weather, like new york summer.
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So I'm in sweatpants, I'm just whatever.
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I get out of the car, we go to a cracker ball and like I die immediately, like it's so hot.
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I've never humidity heat like this before in my life.
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So I'm sweating buckets just from the car parking lot to the front of the building.
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I look crazy.
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I must look like I was running track or something like that.
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I was just buckets.
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Anyway, we visit for the weekend and we fall in love with the area.
00:09:01.365 --> 00:09:14.149
We were visiting homes and things like that and just getting a feel for the area and then by Labor Day, weekend, kids, dog, everything packed, no jobs, no family support out here, no friends.
00:09:14.149 --> 00:09:14.831
We knew nobody.
00:09:14.831 --> 00:09:18.941
We didn't even visit the apartment that we wound up staying in for a year Now.
00:09:18.941 --> 00:09:22.211
We wound up building this house a year later and we're still here.
00:09:23.059 --> 00:09:41.568
But I share that to hopefully let somebody know like you can make a lot happen in a short amount of time once you make a really powerful decision, once you get very committed, and that's part of what I call like my win formula, like I call like the eye, the intentions right, when you get really laser focused and set on.
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I'm gonna do this and you can either come with me or get out the way, and that's.
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That's just how we operate.
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And we've been here, we've been able to thrive since, we've been able to build a great network with people around here, and there's still more to do in my opinion, but right now we're in a really comfortable spot, we're safe, we're in a, you know, a stable community.
00:10:04.386 --> 00:10:06.051
So it worked out.
00:10:06.110 --> 00:10:22.381
Sometimes you got to just go all in and play your hand and just do it you're giving me a lot of hope right now because I mean, I think the only thing holding me back is the football for my son here and he really wants to follow the school system.
00:10:22.381 --> 00:10:32.916
But I have always I just want to get in my car and set a day and a half and see whatever direction I go.
00:10:32.916 --> 00:10:36.009
That's where I need to end up and try or something.
00:10:36.009 --> 00:10:45.669
But I was like I just want to get up and move and just have a fresh start and I feel like I want to do that every 10 years or something so I can see the world and try new things.
00:10:45.669 --> 00:10:47.573
But you just never know.
00:10:47.573 --> 00:10:51.301
And yeah, I got to do that, but I started one of my goals.
00:10:51.301 --> 00:10:56.970
Instead of just up and moving, I started writing a book and I'm so excited and I know.
00:10:57.490 --> 00:10:59.232
Tell me about the book Huh.
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Tell me about the book.
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Oh, it's a spiritual journey and I got, I gotta see.
00:11:07.691 --> 00:11:10.581
Hopefully the name is not taken, but I've called it darkness.
00:11:10.581 --> 00:11:11.683
Your hour is over.
00:11:11.683 --> 00:11:15.630
So, yeah, just different things.
00:11:15.630 --> 00:11:21.004
I gotta keep it under wraps, it's a hard book actually, right yeah.
00:11:21.004 --> 00:11:27.152
So I was like man, this better be a bestseller into a movie, because it sure could be.
00:11:27.211 --> 00:11:51.951
But I don't think I would want to watch it because I had to live it out there when I was approached with writing the chapter for Journey of Riches last year, in 2024.
00:11:51.951 --> 00:11:53.155
And it just came at the right time.
00:11:53.155 --> 00:11:57.942
I'm named after the author, so Alexandre Dumas, it's in my blood.
00:11:57.942 --> 00:11:58.985
It's kind of destiny If whoever believes in that.
00:11:58.985 --> 00:11:59.788
It's predestined for me to be an author.
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And I love writing in any way and being creative.
00:12:01.975 --> 00:12:06.868
And I wrestle with a lot of it because I'm thinking to myself all right, well, what do I want to talk about?
00:12:06.868 --> 00:12:07.809
What am I going to write about?
00:12:07.809 --> 00:12:08.972
How is self-discovery?
00:12:08.972 --> 00:12:15.681
Well, how do I discover myself?
00:12:15.681 --> 00:12:16.844
How do I find myself?
00:12:16.844 --> 00:12:18.486
And I essentially put my life story into about 5,000 words.
00:12:18.486 --> 00:12:31.269
And the scary quote, unquote scary part about that is just recognizing that people that I know, people that I grew up with, people that love me, family, right, all that they're going to read, that they're going to see some of the things yes, oh, my God, I didn't know.
00:12:31.269 --> 00:12:32.171
I didn't know you felt like that.
00:12:32.171 --> 00:12:35.110
I didn't know you were going through these challenges.
00:12:35.110 --> 00:12:49.182
And you know, to your earlier comment about me, like, yeah, I'm extroverted, I'm a comedian, I'm extroverted, I'm a comedian, I love to make people laugh, I love to make people smile, I love just that's part of me right.
00:12:49.221 --> 00:12:53.828
But what I shared in the book was that I use that as a mask.
00:12:53.828 --> 00:13:00.240
I use that as a way to keep people at arm's length because I was so insecure inside I was.
00:13:00.240 --> 00:13:00.740
So I felt inadequate.
00:13:00.740 --> 00:13:04.163
I felt like this is the only way that I could get acceptance right.
00:13:04.163 --> 00:13:06.144
I felt like this is the only way that I could get acceptance right.
00:13:06.144 --> 00:13:14.611
It's a difference between wanting to entertain and be fun and be lively versus this pressure of having to Like.
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This is all I am.
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This is my identity, nadine.
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Like this is me.
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If I'm not funny, if I'm not the clown, if I'm not the goofy guy, then what am I?
00:13:23.038 --> 00:13:24.919
Are people going to like like, see through the mask?
00:13:24.919 --> 00:13:26.744
Are people gonna recognize oh, this guy's.
00:13:26.764 --> 00:13:40.428
Like we didn't use depressed in the 90s right, that wasn't a word anxiety, these things didn't exist, or at least we didn't have awareness of or as much uh promotion about or knowledge about.
00:13:40.428 --> 00:13:42.734
So I'm just thinking, well, what's wrong with me?
00:13:42.734 --> 00:13:44.765
Why am I like this?
00:13:44.765 --> 00:13:54.221
I should be happy, I have everything on paper, I have everything that you should want two parents, uh, great siblings, stable home, right.
00:13:54.221 --> 00:14:03.347
No, nothing on the surface you should be like, wow, like you know, you have a great life, like I'm very fortunate, right as a black man, to have these things.
00:14:03.347 --> 00:14:06.114
But yet inside I'm like what's wrong with me?
00:14:06.114 --> 00:14:07.825
Why am I not happy?
00:14:07.825 --> 00:14:11.090
Why is nothing lighting me up?
00:14:11.090 --> 00:14:22.714
I pour, I give, I share, but then it's like I'm drained, I have nothing left for me so yeah, and I just commend you so back to the writing.
00:14:22.774 --> 00:14:44.333
I just commend you for for putting words to paper like your real thoughts, your real experiences, and sharing your story, because, once again, story matters, your voice matters yeah, being heard in voice and you know I'm learning more about what I went through and the strength I have, which is amazing.
00:14:44.914 --> 00:14:48.158
So it really touches the soul when you write is what I'm learning.
00:14:48.158 --> 00:14:50.321
But I will wake up.
00:14:50.321 --> 00:15:02.485
I'm so excited I actually wake up at 4.30 in the morning and get my coffee brewing and because everybody's still asleep and it's nice and quiet in the house and I was like, okay, I got this and.
00:15:02.485 --> 00:15:11.975
But you know, I will stop around 630, wherever I'm at, because I don't want to have burnout or just quit or anything like that.
00:15:11.975 --> 00:15:23.352
So I set that as a 2025 goal and the other one is to take a course and learn all these new A-Live stuff out there so I can be on top of my game.
00:15:23.352 --> 00:15:29.467
So, but it's interesting, you know, I mean kudos to you.
00:15:29.467 --> 00:15:33.215
I mean you had more than one, correct.
00:15:33.215 --> 00:15:36.407
So you helped out with other books too, correct?
00:15:37.489 --> 00:15:38.110
Not at the moment.
00:15:38.110 --> 00:15:40.695
I'm drafting up some eBooks for myself.
00:15:40.695 --> 00:15:49.086
I'm creating a some ebooks for myself.
00:15:49.086 --> 00:15:50.370
I'm I'm uh creating a supplement guide for my keynotes, uh.
00:15:50.370 --> 00:15:52.076
So I literally started getting as we're writing, as we're speaking this out.
00:15:52.076 --> 00:16:01.308
Right now I'm in the process of just mapping it out and it's really gonna be just about a book of questions, because I have this I you might have heard this expression before.
00:16:01.328 --> 00:16:10.438
It's not something that I created, but it's something that I it's a philosophy that I live by is the quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ask yourself.
00:16:10.438 --> 00:16:18.418
So when we were just having this discussion before, the questions that I asked myself, they weren't bad.
00:16:18.418 --> 00:16:19.668
Right, this is not a judgment thing.
00:16:19.668 --> 00:16:24.725
Like Alex, how could you condemn yourself like that thing?
00:16:24.725 --> 00:16:26.009
Like alex, how could you like condemn yourself like that?
00:16:26.009 --> 00:16:37.399
But I, just the way I see it now, through through the work that I've done the, the inner work with myself over the last 11, 12 years now, the questions I used to ask myself were why is life like this nadine?
00:16:37.399 --> 00:16:38.405
Why can't I have that?
00:16:38.405 --> 00:16:39.147
Uh?
00:16:39.147 --> 00:16:41.211
Why, why doesn't she like me?
00:16:41.211 --> 00:16:42.073
Why is it like this?
00:16:42.073 --> 00:16:43.076
Why I'm right?
00:16:43.076 --> 00:16:47.571
All these things that I've just kept just ruminating and thinking about, like what's wrong with me?
00:16:47.571 --> 00:16:49.712
That's really where the core of it came to.
00:16:49.712 --> 00:16:51.009
It's like what's wrong with me.
00:16:52.046 --> 00:17:00.827
The questions I start to ask myself and have been given to me is like, well, this is the situation I'm in, this is what's happening, what do I want to create from it?
00:17:00.827 --> 00:17:04.375
Who is available to help me?
00:17:04.375 --> 00:17:05.498
What's available to me?
00:17:05.498 --> 00:17:06.690
What resources are there?
00:17:06.690 --> 00:17:09.692
And that gives me a way out.
00:17:09.692 --> 00:17:10.964
It gives me a place of strength.
00:17:10.964 --> 00:17:14.173
It gives me a place of creation of okay, I'm not stuck here.
00:17:14.173 --> 00:17:15.577
I'm in a situation.
00:17:15.577 --> 00:17:23.013
I don't like it or it's not favorable for me, but I know I have enough talent, I know I have enough gifts, resources, abilities.
00:17:23.013 --> 00:17:26.710
I know I have enough gifts, resources, abilities.
00:17:26.710 --> 00:17:28.457
I know enough support out there that I can find a way through it.
00:17:28.477 --> 00:17:32.792
Right, and it's not to spiritually bypass and not to like dismiss it and like toxic positivity, like everything's all right, nothing's wrong.
00:17:32.792 --> 00:17:35.568
Yeah, sometimes stuff, stuff is wrong, stuff sucks.
00:17:35.568 --> 00:17:38.756
Now it's the question of what I want to do about it.
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Do I want to stay like this or do I want to have something different?
00:17:41.730 --> 00:18:01.648
And so this ebook is really going to just be an opportunity for people just to ask themselves some more powerful questions, and it's related to that framework I mentioned earlier about when right, about looking at your worth right, your self-worth as the W, the I, your intentions, your commitments and then your end for your network, your community, your support system.
00:18:02.190 --> 00:18:18.950
And I think in my life, when I have succeeded the most, when I've had the most progress, when I've had the most breakthroughs, these elements have shown up right when I've raised the vibration of myself like okay, I deserve to have this, I deserve to have good things happen in my life.
00:18:18.950 --> 00:18:22.367
You know what, now that I know who I am, I know that I value myself.
00:18:22.367 --> 00:18:26.237
I'm a madman going after this goal.
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I'm going to get it, I'm going to make it happen, no matter what.
00:18:28.632 --> 00:18:32.015
And the major question is like all right, who's going to help me do that?
00:18:32.015 --> 00:18:37.336
Because I could do it on my own and take all the credit and be super Alex superhero.
00:18:38.765 --> 00:18:40.269
But why wouldn't I make?
00:18:40.269 --> 00:18:42.693
Why wouldn't I not make this simple?
00:18:42.693 --> 00:18:50.538
Why would I not have other people with me celebrate, right, when we just had the Super Bowl here a couple weeks ago?
00:18:50.538 --> 00:18:56.036
Imagine if it was just Jalen Hurts on the field and all the confetti.
00:18:56.036 --> 00:19:00.237
It'd feel good, but you kind of get bored after a minute.
00:19:00.237 --> 00:19:07.731
But if you have a whole team with you staff coaches we're jumping, we're celebrating, we're hugging, we're crying, we're laughing.
00:19:07.731 --> 00:19:15.266
But you don't forget that if you're the only person in the room with the champagne and the confetti, then it gets kind of lame.
00:19:16.146 --> 00:19:19.250
Exactly, and I am a huge Eagles fan.
00:19:19.751 --> 00:19:29.329
I'm not I'm a Giants fan, so it was painful for me to even acknowledge so good bringing it up Was that hard to say, it's painful, but you know what?
00:19:29.329 --> 00:19:30.833
At least it wasn't a cowboy, so I'll.
00:19:30.993 --> 00:19:33.898
Oh my gosh, Amen to that.
00:19:33.898 --> 00:19:41.558
You know I'm in Texas, but definitely going through that in the keynotes.
00:19:41.558 --> 00:19:47.949
I mean, do you go out and you're doing guest speaking to professional speakers?
00:19:47.949 --> 00:19:53.967
So I guess is that coming from the books or is it different topics that you've come up with?
00:19:53.987 --> 00:19:56.250
Yeah, it's.
00:19:56.250 --> 00:20:04.073
I think it's all related because I think part of my story ties into, like the teaching points.
00:20:04.073 --> 00:20:27.634
So the keynote that I'm working on, I'm building out right now it's called Speak Up, stand Out, build Unshakable Confidence to Amplify your Voice and Impact, and I sprinkle in that wind framework in there and also a bit of my life story, and I think the key for myself as a speaker and for any speaker or anybody aspiring to be a speaker out there is really focusing on what's the audience going to get out of this?
00:20:27.634 --> 00:20:29.479
How is this going to benefit them?
00:20:29.479 --> 00:20:38.430
Because when I would was first started out a couple years ago, I put a lot of pressure on myself, like all right, I gotta perform right.
00:20:38.430 --> 00:20:44.675
I kind of went back into like little alex mode of like all right, gotta make sure they like me, like it's not about that.
00:20:44.675 --> 00:20:46.867
What's the transformation for them?
00:20:46.867 --> 00:20:50.476
How is how will what my words say?
00:20:50.476 --> 00:20:51.778
How will they hear it?
00:20:51.778 --> 00:20:55.135
And then how will they internalize it, how will they use it and apply it?
00:20:55.135 --> 00:21:01.768
And that's what, over these last couple of years now, I've been really focused on and that's where I've been seeing a lot of better results.
00:21:01.807 --> 00:21:05.046
Because when we're focusing on them, when we're.
00:21:05.046 --> 00:21:14.251
When I'm taking someone on a journey of supporting them and serving them, right, it gets me off of the soapbox like, all right, just alex the impressive.
00:21:14.251 --> 00:21:18.468
Like let me tell you, nadine, how awesome I am and I'm doing so great.
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And you know I do this.
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